


As Long As You Need

by Ithiel_Dragon



Series: Letting Off Steam [2]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Explicit Sexual Content, M/M, Nightmares, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Romance, slight knife play
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-10
Updated: 2016-08-10
Packaged: 2018-08-07 21:52:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7731109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ithiel_Dragon/pseuds/Ithiel_Dragon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Keith has a nightmare, Shiro is there for him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	As Long As You Need

_There is fire. Heat. Blistering his skin. Charring his bones. Fear burns like acid in the back of his throat. He hates it. Feeling so small. Feeling so helpless. Unable to help. Then there is nothing. Cold. Endless blackness. He's alone. That's worse. He wants to cry. He wants to beg. But he can't. He can't be weak. He has to be strong. Survive. Even if it means being alone…_

"Keith!"

His eyes open. There is a hand on his arm. Touching him. Keith reacts without thinking. In less than a second the knife he keeps hidden under his pillow is in his hand, and he grabs his attacker. Flipping them around the other man makes a startled sound when his back hits the bed, and then Keith is straddling him. The knife is at the other man's throat.

"Keith…"

Keith blinks. He looks down at the man beneath him. Really looks. He notices the shock of white hair in the dim starlight first. Then the deep brown eyes staring up at him in concern. Not fear…even when Keith has a knife to his throat.

"Shiro…"

"Yeah. It's me," the older Paladin says softly. His hands are hovering near Keith's bare thighs, close enough that Keith can feel the warmth of them, but not touching him. Not touching…

"Keith?"

Keith blinks.

"I'm here…" Keith's words sound uncertain even to himself. Shiro is silent for several long moments.

"You were screaming. Calling my name," he finally says. Keith says nothing; simply continues to stare down at the older man. The white strands of hair fall over his brow, there are lines around the dark eyes that had not been there before, the scar marrs his handsome face, the corners of his mouth turned downward in the slightest frown. Small imperfections that prove to Keith that this is real. That he isn't still dreaming. Shiro is really here. Keith relaxes slowly. He allows the knife to draw away from where it's pressing against the fragile skin of Shiro's throat. It hadn't drawn blood, Keith notices with some relief. Not even a scratch. Keith watches the way Shiro's throat moves as he swallows.

"Keith?"

"I'm sorry…" Keith says softly. Because he knows that's what he _should_ say. It was quite rude, to say the very least, to pull a knife on one's teammate. Not just his teammate, but his leader. His friend…

"It's okay," Shiro replies, and he sounds as if he actually means it. Probably because if anyone could understand, it was Shiro, even though Keith could have killed him. All it would have taken was one quick flick of his wrist… He is _still_ holding his knife dangerously close to Shiro's neck. No longer touching but still… He knows he should probably put the knife away. That would be the _polite_ thing to do. Keith knows he isn't in any danger. Never had been. It was only a dream. An old memory he thought long buried.

"Keith?"

If anyone could understand, it's Shiro.

"I don't want to be alone." Keith whispers and Shiro blinks rapidly as though surprised. Considering where he'd been living before Shiro had returned to Earth, it probably sounded strange. It wasn't as though Keith _liked_ being alone. Well, sometimes. But often he felt as though he had no choice in the matter. Sometimes it was just easier. He often still felt alone out here, in space, surrounded by 'friends' he often could not relate to. He was just... different. He'd been different his whole life. He'd never be like them, no matter how hard he tried.

But that had never seemed to matter to Shiro. Even back at Galaxy Garrison, Shiro had seemed to like him just as he was. Never asked him to change. Never expected him to be anyone different. It had been...nice. But then Shiro left, and when he had come back he'd been so different. Understandable, probably, considering what he'd been through. But he acted almost like a stranger to Keith. He'd been distant, pushing him away. Never letting Keith get close. And it had hurt, so much. Until that night he'd found Shiro training alone, found out why, and Keith had literally knocked some sense into the older Paladin. Then they had...and it had been good. So good. Keith had never felt so close to anyone before.

He wanted that again.

"You're not alone. I'm right here," Shiro says, so reassuringly that Keith almost believes him.

"Touch me?" he whispers.

"What?"

"Please." Keith can barely hear his own soft plea, but apparently Shiro does. Because a moment later he feels the soft brush of Shiro's hands against his outer thighs. One warm, soft, human. The other, a little cooler, metallic, smooth. Both of them gentle. So gentle. It makes something tight in Keith's chest unwind a little.

"It's all right," Shiro whispers. Gentle. So gentle.

Keith lets out a long slow breath and settles more comfortably where he straddles Shiro's waist. Shiro's breath hitches a little. He can feel the heat from Shiro's skin against his inner thighs. The underwear they are both wearing is hardly a barrier between them, and Shiro is hard. Keith tilts his head a fraction as he stares down at the older man in consideration. Despite Keith's offer, they hadn't done this since that night in the training room. Hadn't even spoken of it. Which had been disappointing, but Keith hadn't wanted to push Shiro into something he wasn't ready for or didn't want. But judging by what he was feeling, that wasn't the case.

"You like this," he concludes, and even in the dim light Keith can see the older Paladin blush. Maybe Shiro just needed him to take the lead, in this at least.

"I…" whatever Shiro was going to say, probably an apology of some sort, is lost in a low groan when Keith rolls his hips, the friction between them is pleasant to say the least.

"Touch me," Keith repeats his request, now nearly a demand, and Shiro doesn't argue. The hands on his thighs start to move in the gentlest caress. His legs are stroked from his upper thighs down to his knees. Keith's skin pimples into gooseflesh and a slight shiver passes through him, but Shiro's hands smooth it away.

As before, neither of them asks stupid questions. _Are you sure_? He wouldn't be doing this if he wasn't. _Are you okay_? Neither of them were, but that was fine. They didn't need to be. Not for this. They only needed to be here for each other.

Keith runs the flat edge of his knife over Shiro's collarbone, and the older Paladin shivers. The sharp point traces the neckline of the dark t-shirt and Shiro's fingers tighten a little on Keith's hips. A light squeeze. Reassuring. A slight nod grants Keith all the permission he needs. Shiro's eyes are open and trusting. With a flick of Keith's wrist and a tug, the sharp knife splits the dark fabric easily down the middle. The ruined pieces fall aside, exposing the older man's well-muscled chest and stomach.

Keith watches the slow rise and fall of that chest. He reaches out to trace one of the more jagged scars with his fingertips, starting at the older man's navel and running along Shiro's ribs almost to his back. He's already seen many of them. Touched them. But they were still something of a shock. Shiro remains still. Letting him look. Letting him touch. Only the slight pressure of Shiro's thumbs digging into the soft part of his upper thighs give any indication that Keith's touch is affecting him.

Keith leans down to press his lips to Shiro's sternum. He feels more than hears Shiro's breath hitch. He kisses the hollow of Shiro's throat next, then underneath his jaw. He hears Shiro whisper his name. When their lips meet it's almost hesitant. Slow. Unhurried. Savoring. He feels Shiro's hands move up his sides and slip underneath his t-shirt. Keith moans softly when he feels the older man's fingers slide across his ribs, and he feels Shiro smile against his lips. He rocks his hips against Shiro's again, their cocks slide together, and the older Paladin's lips part in a gasp. Keith lets his tongue slip inside Shiro's mouth to taste and he feels Shiro's fingers dig into the muscles of his back.

It feels good and it's exactly what they both need. A reminder that they can still feel good.

Shiro suddenly flips them, and Keith's breath rushes from his lungs due to the weight of the older man pinning him to the bed. His legs are spread wide to accommodate Shiro's hips, and the metal hand wraps around Keith's wrist, holding it and the knife, trapped above his head. Keith tests Shiro's hold, and while it's not tight enough to hurt, it's definitely not loose enough to allow him to escape.

With the older Paladin looming above him like this, he's reminded of just how much _bigger_ than him Shiro is. While Keith will be the first to say that size isn't everything in a fight, Shiro knows how to use his size and strength to his full advantage. Besides, this isn't a fight, and Keith can't deny it's a bit thrilling to be manhandled like this. Because he trusts Shiro completely, even if Shiro doesn't trust himself sometimes. He knows the older Paladin will never do anything to him he doesn't want.

Shiro shrugs off his ruined shirt, further exposing himself to Keith's hungry gaze, and Keith wraps his legs around the older man's hips, arching to bring their bodies into even closer contact. Shiro groans and presses a kiss to Keith's temple, his cheek, the corner of his mouth, his chin. Keith tilts his head back with a moan as Shiro's lips move down his throat and his free hand finds its way into the older man's hair. His nails scratch lightly through the soft strands at the back of Shiro's head and neck as Shiro pushes Keith's shirt up to his armpits, then dig in a little harder when the older Paladin's mouth latches onto one of his nipples.

"Shiro…" Keith practically whines when the other man's tongue flicks across the sensitive bud, causing it to harden. Then he bucks underneath the strong body holding him down when Shiro's teeth lightly graze the sensitive peak.

His cock is leaking so much at this point the front of his underwear is damp and sticking to them both as they move together. Keith's free hand slides over Shiro's shoulders and down his back as far as he can reach. He can feel the way the strong muscles shift and flex with every move Shiro makes. He can also feel the scars. Many more than are on Shiro's front. Long thin lines that cross over each other, one layered upon another. A part of him had wanted to ask, but he didn't need to. He could guess their origin.

At one point, probably many times in fact, Shiro had been whipped.

Anger flares in Keith bright and hot all of a sudden, and he growls in the back of his throat before he realizes it. Shiro lifts his head, looking surprised and a bit concerned by the sound. Guilty. Like he's done something wrong, and Keith hates that look. He hates how far away Shiro sometimes looks, and Keith knows he's reliving every horror he can remember at the Galra's hands. He hates the scars, and that Shiro had to suffer through all the pain that had put them there. He hates knowing how Shiro doubts himself, doesn't trust himself, fears he might hurt them... Shiro is such a good man. The best man Keith has ever known. He didn't deserve this... Any of it...

"I'll kill anyone who tries to hurt you again," Keith says fiercely, his thumb running gently over the scar on Shiro's face, and his fingers tenderly cupping the older man's cheek. Shiro goes unnaturally still, whether due to his words or his touch, Keith isn't sure, but he suddenly regrets both. He doesn't regret what he's said, because it's true, he only regrets saying it aloud. If it's caused Shiro to have a flashback now of all times…

But then suddenly Shiro is surging upwards and kissing him so hard and deep that Keith can barely breathe and that's just fine with him. He feels Shiro's hand slide down his naked side to slip underneath the waistband of his underwear, and moans helplessly when the large warm palm grips his ass and squeezes.

Keith is panting by the time their lips part, squirming underneath Shiro, and clinging to the older man as much as he can, and it still doesn't feel like he's close enough.

"Easy," Shiro whispers, nuzzling Keith's ear, and he responds with an impatient sound. Shiro chuckles softly and kisses the hinge of his jaw, "How far do you want to go?"

The question is combined with a delicious squeeze to his ass and Keith answers without hesitation.

"All the way," Keith had never been one to shy away from a challenge, and he isn't about to start now. Besides, it had felt good the last time, Shiro touching him there. He wanted to feel what it was like, more...deeper... Shiro draws back to look down at him, suddenly serious.

"Have you ever done this before?" he asks. Something Shiro hadn't asked that night in the training room, though it had probably been obvious. Keith knows he could lie, but he's never lied to Shiro before, so he shakes his head, "We don't have to…"

Keith cuts him off before Shiro can continue.

"I want to," he insists, then adds a little more shyly, "I want _you_."

Keith knows that's the right thing to say, the way Shiro's eyes darken. His pupils are blown so wide with desire that almost no sliver of color remains. He loves that he can make Shiro look at him like that.

"Do you have anything?" Shiro asks then, his fingers shifting along to even more intimate areas, sliding between his cheeks to ghost lightly over Keith's entrance. Keith's breath catches at the touch and a shiver passes through his entire body. He's not sure whether to squirm back onto those gently probing fingers or to rub his trapped erection against the firm planes of Shiro's stomach. Still he manages a shaky nod, blushing a little at the memory of when he'd gone to Coran and asked him if the castle had any…supplies of that kind.

Yes, he was a teenager. Yes, he was a guy. Yes, he jerked off. Nothing to be ashamed of really. But it had still been a bit embarrassing. Especially when Coran had told him he was surprised Keith hadn't come to him sooner. Apparently Lance had already requested several samples of lubricant for personal use, and really Keith didn't need to know that much about his teammate's masturbatory habits.

"Table drawer," he told Shiro, and whined a little when the older man sat up on his knees, removing the delicious friction between them. Shiro smiled down at him, and then maneuvered Keith's trapped wrist down, the one still holding the knife (he'd almost forgotten about it). Keith shivered when the blade slid between his thigh and the waistband of his underwear, the cool metal a sharp contrast to his overheated skin. He looked up at the older man in anticipation.

Shiro smiled at him.

"Turnabout is fair play, I think," Shiro says, and then the knife is slicing through Keith's briefs. Keith whimpers when his erection bounces free, leaking against his stomach. Shiro releases his wrist finally and both the ruined underwear and the knife are cast aside. Shiro's hands hook underneath his knees, pushing them up and wide, exposing him completely. Keith feels himself blushing in spite of himself, even in the dim light; he's never had anyone look at him like this before.

Shiro brushes a kiss against the inside of his knee, and then trails a light series of kisses along his inner thigh. Keith whimpers when Shiro sucks on the sensitive skin where his leg meets his body and his fingers find their way back into the older Paladin's hair.

"Shiro… Fuck…" Keith gasps when his balls are licked and then Shiro's tongue trails up the underside of his cock to the slit. He watches as Shiro licks away the precome pooling on his stomach, and his hips buck uncontrollably when the older Paladin draws away, removing the wonderful feeling of his mouth far too soon. Shiro chuckles, one hand pressing firmly on Keith's lower stomach to hold him still while he reaches over to open the bedside table drawer, no doubt searching for the lubricant Keith had said was inside.

Unable to resist such a tempting sight, Keith leans up to kiss and lick at Shiro's strong pectoral muscle before suckling teasingly on the nipple closest to him. Shiro stills and groans deep in his throat. Keith smiles against Shiro's sweat-dampened skin, and nips playfully at the sensitive flesh. Shiro hisses softly and his fingers thread through Keith's hair, petting at first, and then tugging gently. Keith resists for a moment but finally allows Shiro to draw him away. Keith looks up at him with feigned innocence that makes Shiro snort softly, not the least bit fooled.

Shiro finds the tin of lubricant and the drawer is shut with a little more force than is strictly necessary. Shiro kisses Keith firmly, licking his way into the younger Paladin's mouth and nipping softly on his swollen lips, making Keith whimper. Again, Shiro draws away too soon for his liking, but Keith decides to forgive him when the older man pushes his legs apart and hikes his lower body into his lap. Keith grabs his own knees, holding himself open for Shiro, as the older man opens the tin and slicks his fingers.

Shiro's human fingers wrap around his cock first, and Keith bites his own lip and whimpers at the feeling of those strong slick digits playing with him. So different, and so much better than his own hand. Shiro strokes him from base to tip, his thumb curling around the tip on each upstroke, spreading the leaking fluid down to further slick his shaft. His balls are cupped and fondled and Keith is trembling. If Shiro keeps touching him like this he knows he's not going to last much longer.

"Shiro… I'm gonna…"

"Go on. I've got you," and like so many other commands Shiro gives, Keith finds he can't resist. He cries out, his back arching as his climax rolls through him. His muscles tremble as he spills trails of sticky white come along his thighs, stomach, and Shiro's fingers. He whimpers as Shiro continues to stroke him slowly, milking him of every drop. By the time Shiro's hand stills, all of Keith's muscles have relaxed to the point that he's nearly boneless and not sure he could move even if he wanted to.

"Fuck, you're beautiful," he hears Shiro breathe, almost in awe, and Keith cracks his eyes open to stare up at Shiro through his eyelashes. Shiro swears again and Keith can't help but grin. Shiro chuckles, his expression nothing short of fond, and his fingers trail down, past his balls to lightly tease around Keith's entrance.

"Ready?" Shiro asks, and Keith hums softly, lifting his hips slightly in invitation, but the older man doesn't enter him right away. Instead he continues to gently rub and circle the sensitive rim, and Keith's hole twitches and flutters at the foreign yet pleasant sensation.

"Shiro _please_ ," Keith whines and tries to lift his hips again, to push Shiro's fingers deeper where he wants them. The older Paladin finally takes pity on him and allows one finger to slide into him slowly, he's so relaxed from his climax and eager that it's almost too easy. Which is both exactly what Keith needs and yet not enough. Shiro is infinitely patient where Keith is not, and takes his time preparing him. The single finger thrusting in and out and gently circling inside of him help him relax for a larger, deeper invasion.

Keith is whimpering and panting and trying to fuck himself harder on Shiro's hand by the time the older man finally gives him what he wants, adding a second finger inside of him. He immediately feels much fuller and it burns a little, but Keith wouldn't exactly call it pain. Still, Shiro seems far too careful as he begins to thrust inside him with two fingers.

"Still okay?" the older man asks, and Keith nods. He knows he needs to let Shiro do this at his own pace, but it's almost more frustrating than pleasurable how slowly the fingers are moving in and out of him.

"I'm not going to break, Shiro," Keith finally says, and almost regrets it when the fingers inside of him still. But then Shiro smiles. It has a slightly wicked edge to it and Keith isn't sure whether or not to be worried. Then Shiro's fingers push deeper into him and curl, and the younger Paladin practically jumps out of his skin and yelps in surprised pleasure.

"Better?" Shiro asks, chuckling, far too pleased with himself. But Keith nods vigorously anyway and moans as the older man's fingers move faster and deeper inside him, occasionally playing with that place inside of him that makes Keith arch and whimper helplessly.

Keith is trembling and he's almost completely hard once more by the time Shiro slips a third finger inside of him. There's fullness just on the good edge of pain at first, and it takes him a little longer to get used to the feeling, but he's practically writhing on Shiro's fingers soon enough, begging for more. He wants Shiro inside of him now. Wants to come with Shiro inside him, fucking him.

"Christ, the mouth on you," Shiro breaths and Keith blushes a little realizing he's said all of that aloud, but can't regret it when the other man withdraws his fingers and quickly shucks off his final piece of clothing. Shiro is tall and powerfully built, and even with the scars, his body is gorgeous. His cock is equally as impressive, and Keith can't help but moan a little at the sight of it. Shiro grins, because he's a guy, and all guys have an ego when it comes to their cocks. So Keith forgives him when Shiro stokes himself and cheekily asks, "Like what you see?"

"Yes. Now fucking fuck me Shiro, fuck!" Keith demands and Shiro laughs loud. It's such a fucking beautiful sound that it makes Keith's chest ache a little.

"Language, Keith," Shiro chides playfully, but whatever retort Keith might have given is forgotten when the older Paladin presses the head of his cock against his relaxed opening, "Just relax."

Keith does as he's told, but even with all the prep, it still burns when Shiro starts to push inside of him. The stretch is so much more intense than when the fingers had been inside, and the other man hasn't even gotten the whole head of his cock inside of him yet. Keith whines softly before he can stop himself, and Shiro makes soft hushing sounds, gently caressing his hip.

"Easy…easy… Tell me if it's too much," Shiro says, stilling to allow Keith a chance to become used to the feeling. Keith responds by wrapping his legs around Shiro's back and hooking his ankles together just in case he decides to do something dumb like stop. Shiro chuckles softly and shifts to lean down on his elbows, bringing him close enough to kiss Keith's brow, then his eyelids, his cheeks, and then finally his lips.

Keith wraps his arms around Shiro's torso, his fingers digging a little into the strong muscles of the older Paladin's back as Shiro slides deeper into him. It doesn't exactly feel good yet, but the worst of the pain is fading to a dull throb by the time he feels Shiro's thighs against his ass. Shiro is breathing nearly as hard as he is by that point.

"Fuck… You feel so fucking good…" Shiro breaths against his ear.

"Language," Keith says with a small smirk just to hear Shiro laugh again. Then he tightens his muscles around Shiro's cock inside of him to hear him moan.

"Keith…" Shiro whispers and finally begins to move, drawing out only an inch or two before pushing back inside of him. Even that small bit of friction seems to set all of Keith's nerves on fire, and he gasps sharply and clutches at Shiro tighter.

"Keith?" there is a note of worry in the older man's voice, probably afraid he's hurt him, and Keith is quick to reassure.

"It's good. Fuck. Do that again, please," then he whimpers when Shiro does just that. The slow shallow thrusts continue for a time before they both become impatient with slow and tender. Soon Shiro is drawing out almost completely before filling him again, and Keith lifts his hips to meet every deep thrust with a moan of pleasure. His cock is rock hard and leaking, creating a mess against Shiro's stomach trapped between their bodies. They kiss just as messily, licking and panting into each other's mouths, unable to get enough. Needing to touch as much as possible. Keith clings to Shiro as the older Paladin braces his arms on either side of his head and fucks him even harder. He's not going to last much longer and neither is Shiro.

"Keith… I'm…" Shiro pants and Keith tightens his legs around the moving hips to keep him inside, clenching around his cock in a way he knows is going to get Shiro off. He's not disappointed when Shiro makes an almost wounded sound and every muscle in his body grows taunt. Keith feels the hot rush of Shiro's pleasure inside of him and that's all he needs to finish too. He cries out and trembles as he comes between their bodies.

Shiro practically collapses on top of him making it a little difficult for Keith to breathe, but he wouldn't have it any other way. He listens to the way Shiro pants in his ear and smooths his hands down the older man's trembling back. It feels so good Keith never wants it to end.

Of course it has to. Shiro recovers first and starts to ease himself up off of Keith, allowing the younger Paladin to breathe a little easier. Keith allows it, though a part of him doesn't want to, his legs untangling from the other man and sprawling open, his arms falling almost limp on the bed beside him. He's still trembling faintly, he's sore in places he's never been before, covered in sweat and come, and he's not sure he's ever felt so content in his life.

Keith feels Shiro draw out of him and he whimpers softly, definitely sore and sensitive, and the older man hushes him softly, pressing a tender kiss to his temple. He doesn't open his eyes as he feels Shiro shift to lie beside him, content to simply lie there and enjoy the afterglow of pleasure. Until he feels a soft cloth start to wipe at the mess on his stomach, thighs, and very tenderly between his legs. He slits his eyes open and recognizes it as the remains of Shiro's shirt, then watches through hooded lashes as the older Paladin cleans himself off quickly. Shiro notices and smiles at him.

"You owe me a shirt," he says playfully.

"You owe me underwear," Keith replies without missing a beat, and Shiro laughs.

"Touché," he says, then tosses the ruined material somewhere onto the floor. Keith reaches out to cup the back of Shiro's neck and draws the older man into a slow lingering kiss. It's ruined when Keith yawns suddenly and Shiro chuckles again, pressing a tender kiss to his hairline instead.

"Think you can sleep now?" Shiro asks, a faint edge of concern in his voice. Keith had almost forgotten about the nightmare that brought Shiro to his room in the first place.

"Will you stay?" he asks, and Shiro smiles.

"As long as you want me to," the older man replies, and Keith pulls him into another lingering kiss.

"Forever," Keith whispers against Shiro's lips, blushing a little. Shiro stills a moment before pressing another gentle kiss to Keith's forehead. Keith wraps his arms around Shiro tightly and tucks his head underneath Shiro's chin. His already-lax body grows even more relaxed held comfortably in Shiro's warm embrace.

"As long as you need…" he hears Shiro whisper before he falls asleep.


End file.
